Relationships and Bipolar

Exploring the intersection of bipolar disorder and nurturing supportive relationships.

Thank you to all who attended the August meeting and contributed to our group discussion on relationships and bipolar. Here are some notes from the discussion:

Challenges:

• Finding it difficult staying in touch with people when our mood is out of balance.

• Feeling guilt and shame about previous behaviour during an episode.

• Over-communicating when mood is elevated and worrying about what people think.

• People being judgmental and not understanding that I’m unwell.

• Causing trouble when mood is elevated and family reminding you what you did or said.

• Being too opinionated or behaving inappropriately during a manic episode.

• Falling out with family or friends due to their lack of understanding or sensitivity.

• Disclosing your diagnosis to colleagues, particularly if you are a manager.

• Feeling like you’ve let people down when you are depressed or tired.

• Worry about what colleagues would say when returning to work after an episode.

• Family are affected by our behaviour and it can take a long time to repair relationships.

• Can be difficult handling stigma and rejection.

• Difficult to trust mental health professionals if you don’t see the same person very often.

• Overspending when mood is elevated and retail therapy when mood is low.

• Putting yourself under pressure to meet up with others.

• Interpreting comments in a negative light due to lack of self-worth or paranoia.

• Withdrawing from social interaction or masking when mood is low.

Things that can help:

• Trust is key.

• Taking responsibility for managing your bipolar e.g. monitor your mood, healthy sleep pattern.

• Keep in touch with people you trust and be kind to others.

• Support from people in your corner who will contact you when you’re not feeling well.

• Open communication is vital.

• Being honest about your condition and how it affects you when you are unwell.

• Dealing with shame -  be honest with the person you hurt and apologise for your behaviour.

• Be mindful that there are two people in a relationship and it's not always your fault.

• ‘It’s OK not to be OK.”

• Colleagues you trust can help support you if you are open about your bipolar.

• Knowing your limits and learning to say no.

• Choosing not to do something or go somewhere if you’re at risk of relapse e.g. alcohol.

• Practicing self-preservation.

• Being open with friends and family about your boundaries.

• It’s good to talk - don’t let problems build up.

• Diffuse difficult situations by stepping back and counting to ten.

• People being honest with you when they think you are becoming unwell.

• Being economical with the truth..